I've had it out with every single one of my roommates. No fist fights, but a lot of arguments and a lot of moving out because “this doesn't work anymore”. I remember this woman Lynne I worked with at my high school job. She told me not to move in with my best friends because we would not be friends after. How could that happen? Well, when you've done things a certain way your whole life and then someone challenges that, the world stops moving a little bit.
My 3rd wedding anniversary is tomorrow! I have a life-long roommate. It's funny because I had lived on my own for a while; probably about 12 years. She is smart and lived with her folks until she had enough money to buy a place. So she's coming from mom and dad's. I'm coming from 2 years with no roommate at all. Let's get hitched and live together.......go! I didn't even know I had strong opinions on where a toaster should go. (Which is near the stove, next to the butter, by the way.) We battled over that for about 2 years. And there were at least a dozen other things just like the toaster. Pretty soon, everyday can be an argument, debate or just giving up ground on something. Your marriage can feel small, tight and trivial. It feels like you can't win. It feels like you wanna leave.
What we need to ask ourselves is this: Are my problems marriage issues or roommate issues?
Do you see where I’m going with this? Pretty crazy what can happen when your ways of doing life collide with each other. How many breakups and divorces were over roommate issues and general way-of-life challenges?
Whether you're married or just living together, please go through your relationship and write down all your problems. Sort them into the roommate or marriage issues and remember why you love the other person. It has really helped me.
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